Today officially marks one whole year I have been striving/working toward a healthier lifestyle. What a crazy year this has been! Excitement, disappointment, anger, joy, desperation, and every other emotion in between has been experienced this year! I would like to think the happy/joyful moments have outweighed the frustration and anger, though. I certainly have a lot to be happy about, seriously.
I have gone from 315 pounds to 199.2 in one year (115.8 pounds lost).
I have gone from a size 28W to a 14/16 in one year.
I have gone from being in pain 24/7 to moving freely and comfortable in one year.
I have gone from miserable to pretty dang happy in one year.
This time last year I had a brace on my ankle. I absolutely *could not* walk without that brace. My back was *always* killing me. I was constantly having headaches. I was depressed and miserable. My heart condition was running my life. I wore only 3X T-shirts and stretchy pants. I thought I would be fat forever.
Today I could not even tell you where that brace is because I have not needed it in such a long time (nor will I ever again). My back *never* hurts. I cannot recall the last time I had a headache. I think it is safe to say I am no longer depressed, and I am certainly not miserable. My heart condition has improved *dramatically* to the point where I can actually *live* my life without worrying so much about it. I can wear most large T-shirts (not even XL) and I am actually wearing real jeans right now. I know I will never be fat again.
I cried today. In public. I was out with my cousin, Maggie, and we were browsing through Rookwood Commons. She was on the hunt for a job, and I was just along for the window shopping. We stopped into Eddie Bauer, and I looked around while she filled out the application. As I rummaged through their clearance racks I had a fleeting thought… “This time last year they would have shooed me out of here immediately because there would be absolutely *nothing* in this store that would fit me.” I found a pair of size 16 jeans. They were marked all the way down to $8.00 (can you believe that?!), so I just had to try them on. They fit, folks. They fit. Eddie Bauer jeans fit my booty. It was such an exhilarating feeling to be able to walk into a store like that and actually find clothes that fit. Me.
As I walked to the counter I began to tear up. I could not help myself. I turned to Maggie and said, “This is the first time in my entire adult life I have *ever* been able to walk into a store (other than Wal-Mart), pick something off the rack (that is not stretchy), and have it actually fit me.” The lady behind the counter actually came out and around to hug me. She said she was proud of me (never met her before, by the way) and she even got a little teary-eyed. What an incredible moment that was.
The people I have met over the last year have made all the difference. There is a saying out there somewhere about positive things happening in one’s life if one surrounds him/herself with positive people/things. That is certainly true. I have never had more positive people in my life, and I have never had so many positive things going on. Denise, of course, is a huge driving force in my life. She has changed my everyday life in such profound ways. All the other trainers at the gym (Dorsey, Aaron, Ketrell, etc.) have contributed too. Without them I would not have come *nearly* this far in one year. I love them, and I am looking forward to another year with them.
I know I still have quite a bit of road left to travel, but I have come *so* far. I also now know I can do it. Whatever *it* may be, I have this. I will get to where I want to be…regardless of what it takes, or how long.
I have only one regret. I wish to hell and back I would have taken a picture (full body) of myself on this day last year. I would absolutely give anything to be able to really *see* what kind of changes my body has undergone in a year. Too late for that now, though, I will just have to take everyone else’s word for it.
Looking back over the last year…how has your life changed? Are you happy with the kind of changes that have occurred in your life over the last year? If not, what steps can/will you take to improve your life in the coming year?